I think I love my parents

 

I was raised by a single parent like most of us in S.A. This meant that my mother had to carry on the role of being a father as well. She managed to handle both roles living up to the fact that women are good at multitasking.  As the years went by the frustration of being a single parent took their toll on her. The lines between fear and respect were blurred and Communication became a one way street. In black homes we are taught that children do not have a voice in the household, your job is to obey. One old man once told me that “Parenting is not a Democracy you as the child did not vote me into this position.

The “lost Generation” is how we are infamously known. The unemployment rate in 2016 is 26.7% and of that percentage 54% is the youth.  Drugs, alcohol abuse, teenage pregnancy and HIV/AIDS are like a plague to our generation, but all this has to have a root all this has to come from somewhere right. As the saying goes “charity begins at home” there is a certain void in our upbringing that leaves us vulnerable to outside influences. All these mischievous things that we get up to are like a cry out to our elders/parents that we need you more than you can imagine. We need your approval your guidance your love. The youth feels misunderstood and without a voice.

I always here our elders saying “kids of today are bad” which for me means they “parents of today” are also responsible because they led us here. We are products of their doing or in most instances a product of the lack of their doing. This does not mean that I am placing the blame solely on our parents but all I ask is that they play an active role in trying to steer us in the right direction. To our parents please don’t give up on us.

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When words flow I write, pen reflects my life.
In this case binary codes, algorithms and auto-correct,
If only life was as simple if only life was so pearfect, right-click perfect.
I was given dominion over all this, but I feel like a minion losing control lost in the abyss.
The void I cannot fill, am I paranoid am I ill?
Just being me isn’t enough, just being here isn’t enough and even these words without action won’t be enough.
Is writing this even necessary, is complaining even primary?
Is my mind primitive or are the neurons in my Brain not yet active.
I don’t need more I need to be more, I don’t want to walk I want to soar they sky.
I feel sparks of greatness; I feel super one minute and Minute the other why bother?
I want to be optimistic in my prime to be called Optimus Prime,
I don’t want to be too tumultuous in my abilities and lose time.

mind is sound, voices depleted. an aggregation of feelings undescribed surfaces to the shore. unsure how, not sure why, for sure I notice , I know this, my heart is content as it leads my mind I focus, hocus pocus this cannot be games I do not play, love is the word I say, together is the only way we pray, an amalgamation of feelings once lost deep inside of ourselves, fears of being hurt deep inside of our shelves, we break free, freedom, seldom do we look back, seldom do we let the past attack, a future we must secure, the allure of a beautiful family, the adoration of the one You, two bodies one soul, our love imprisons us no Parole, our love burns us coal to coal. I am naked vulnerable to your touch, vulnerable to you look your beauty your smile, it is such that has brought me here it is such that brings me near an immaculate creation thank you, a blessing you are. I your moonlight you my star.   

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